Putting your apostrophes in the right places on those ubiquitous carved wooden Welcome Signs is easy once you know the rules. There is no greater motivation than having all those grammatical fuddy-duddies think better of you, either! But, before examining the rules for using apostrophes and how their literary status has earned its reputation, I want to clarify one thing really clear…I’m writing this to be helpful – that’s all. I couldn’t care less if you got your apostrophes wrong. There are many more essential things in life and nature to get on a soap box! Besides, this stuff (and the rules) is not written in granite!
The apostrophe has four primary uses: possession, omission (contractions), plurals, and phrases of time or measure; however, when it comes to knowing how best to create proper identification on Personalized Welcome Signs, we’ll focus on the mystery of the possessive and plurals business only—time and omissions wait for no man!
At the most basic level, if you need to make a possessive, turn the phrase around and make it an "of the..." phrase. For example, the man’s hat = the hat of the man, or three days' trip = trip of three days. Once it’s been determined that you need to make a possessive, here are the rules to create one: add 's to the singular form of the word (even if it ends in -s), like the neighbor’s car or Louis's hat. Adds to the plural forms that do not end in –s, like the children's toys and the moose’s whistle. Add the ' to the end of plural nouns that end in –s, like houses' decks and three dogs’ tails. Add the 's to the end of compound words like my mother-in-law's comments. Finally, add the 's to the last compound nouns to show joint possession of an object like Thom & Elaine’s house.
And, of course, a few exceptions (as shocked as I am sure you are!): Some words sound awkward when an apostrophe 's' is added, like Jesus's disciples, so the accepted form is to just use the 's' apostrophe: Jesus' disciples. Interestingly, this only applies to Biblical or historical significance names, e.g., Jesus, Moses, Ramses…Moses' followers, Ramses' pyramid. Still, others don't have a clutsy sound, like the princess's bed. Just be consistent!
Although it may be worth noting that some “experts will say something like, “…words ending with an s present a problem. There are two valid options in this case. It is either Jesus' teaching or Jesus's teaching. Elegance would seem to preclude the latter….”See what I mean about being consistent! The confusion arises when the apostrophe is used with a plural noun – The vipers’ den…more than one snake in that den, so the s’ – the den of the vipers! Generally speaking, if there's one owner, add an apostrophe and then 's,' and if there are two or more owners, add 's,' then add an apostrophe. For words that form their plural by changing internal letters (instead of adding 's'), like the children’s table…it’s already plural – we don’t pile it on! It’s the same with words people, women…and so on. When using names that end in S, you follow the same rules as with any other name and add apostrophe S: Thomas’s car.
Plural names also follow the same rules: Thomases’ house (add -es to names that end in S to indicate plural form). You generally let your ear be your guide for anyone whose name ends in S. If Lars's house sounds awkward, feel free to omit the final S. The only rule in this case is that you must (MUST) be consistent. You can't have Lars' two-car garage other than Lars's property.
On a Welcome Sign – it’s just not going to happen! This whole business of apostropheological anomalies (I can’t believe I used that again!) stirs passionately among some folks, and there have been whole sub-cultures formed to lobby for the universal observance of the mystery of the apostrophe. I am not of that belief set; I’m just a sign guy; however, I'm pretty sensitive about getting these things right. All you really have to ask yourself is, “Does my sign refer to the object it’s attached to, Larson’s Cabin?” And then, is it the whole gang’s cabin? Either way, I don’t think it’s grammatical. It's “Apostrophological!”
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